Balancing Act!

Trying to keep all the balls in the air and dropped one yesterday - did not get to post to my blog! I feel like the guy on the right - I have too many things I am trying to stabilize in my life and nearly ending up losing my balance! I am so much better at balance than I used to be, but lately I am feeling challenged! I think it is one of my growing edges recently! When my life was less dimensional, I was a workaholic, spending 70-80 hours a week on my career, the rest with spouse and little time for anything else. I ended up very sick, permanently disabled and ultimately alone! Today I have learned to set some goals for various areas of my life - God, self, friends, vocation, home management, community, hobbies, creativity and just plain fun! Of course self includes self care, self awareness activities and self-with-self time! Everything seemed to be going well, even my health had improved to the best it had been in many years, and I was on my way to discovering a new vocation. When, blam, I hit a wall! Ouch! That hurt! I thought I was walking through a door and I hit concrete! God had other plans! Then, blam, a large object fell on me out of the blue! Ouch!!!! Now that really hurt!!!! My mom nearly died and I had to take over her care! A year or so and I thought I would be back on my feet! Oops! I slipped! Too much on my plate and I lost my footing! I kept going at the same pace and Ow! I fell! My health deteriorated from being the best it had been to being the worst it had been in several years! I was nearly hospitalized in September and October! Whew! That was close! Don't want to go there again! Gotta' be careful! I am still learning to keep my pace and keep my balance! Got to let go of some things, especially the ones that are not urgent and are wearing me down! We know what those are! Deep inside a small voice tells us "you don't need to be doing this now!" I pray for things to get better - and they get worse! I get grumpy and short tempered - a sure sign I am out of balance and going against God's Will. When things are tough and I pray for God's will, I am learning that the things I am supposed to be doing get easier and I find support in inexplicable ways! The things I am not supposed to be doing just get harder and the people involved get almost abusive (a sure sign of loss of favor and moving into darkness!!!). I want to walk in the light - follow where the Spirit is leading and stay in balance! God show me your will, show me your way, shine your light on my path and teach me to walk more closely with you!!!!! Keep me in balance! Watch your step, mind your footing, observe your pace, listen to the small voice within, don't slip and fall! Fondly , Dee